The wait is finally over, after a very long few weeks it is now all go. Brendan’s treatment starts this Tuesday. Last Wednesday, not being able to wait any longer without knowing what was going on, I sent an email off to the Sarcoma Multidisciplinary Team requesting a treatment plan, and that same day we asked our GP if he could do the same. As it turned out the very next day we had a call from one of the doctors to say they wanted Brendan down there pronto.
We are now getting organised, ready to hit the road again. This time it feels more daunting than before, it’s not just sitting down talking to doctors and specialists, I have no problem talking. It’s not waiting for scans or even knowing that my husband is going to be cut open and stitched back up. This time it feels real, Brendan is wading into the unknown and I am watching him from as close by as I will be allowed to be, we have no idea how his body is going to react to the chemotherapy.
Sometimes I hear myself screaming on the inside at the thought of Brendan going through all of this. I can’t imagine how he feels. Someone who knows, said to me recently that you know how sick you have to be before you’re dead, when going through chemotherapy treatment. It was confronting to hear, but wasn’t meant to frighten me. She was letting me know that we are all much, much stronger than we think , and that the human body, mind and spirit have the capacity to fight and win against incredible odds.