10/10/17 Beautiful Painful

I’m sure many have experienced the depth of sadness and undeniable beauty I have, in a pure and joyous moment of remembering — where both the beauty of a cherished memory and the pain of devastating loss can be experienced simultaneously – enhancing each to a level barely tolerable and yet you let the feeling…

01/10/17: Brendan loved the ‘Kombi Festival’

‘The Old Bar Festival is not a festival to us…it’s our religion.’ ~ Tyra Maloney Perfectly summed up by our daughter this week, the Kombi Festival as it’s affectionately known in our house is the Maloney Mecca. The first Old Bar Beach Festival was amazing, our kids were toddlers and we pushed them around looking…

27-09-17: The next Step!

A Formidable Pair Brendan and I had what might be considered a pretty traditional relationship. Not for everyone I know—but it worked for us. When it came to the big stuff, like raising a family, we were on the same page and that made the doing easier. I stayed at home with the children, Bren worked…

25-09-17: you can’t please everyone

Four weeks to the day after losing Brendan I received a message from a couple who are well known to us. Even so, we have barely seen them throughout Bren’s illness. The message explained that they were in the area and wanted to see the kids and I as much as they could while they…

17/09/17: Are you OK

One of the most important things we wanted to make sure the kids understood, when the time came, was even though dad was gone it was still OK to laugh and be happy about things.

Two weeks already

Two weeks: and although it had already been a while since he could, it still feels like Bren could walk through the door any minute. It doesn’t feel final, or that he has really gone anywhere. And I know that’s because he hasn’t in anything but a physical sense. This doesn’t make us miss him…

love & rainbows

When rainbows turn up in unexpected places! Yesterday I opened my blog admin to check on  something. To my complete surprise a rainbow had replaced the top bar that has always been black… and it took my breath away. After accusing all of my sisters and nieces in the room of getting on my admin…