12/11/2017: No room for Regret.

If in doubt, follow your heart. As with death, in life — there is no room for regret. I guess in some ways this is another cautionary tail. When my husband Bren was diagnosed with pleomorphic sarcoma in June 2014, we were shocked. It is a rare disease and was diagnosed at late stage. He…

29/10/17: Death – a conversation

  Death: a single moment in time where all that comes before is living; and so too, all that comes after. Grief is an ongoing process; reading through and organising my diary entries from the last 3 years has been a cathartic part of that process for me. Portions of the following post have come from a diary entry…

23/10/17: The Shed Luxe…is exactly what I needed!

A little Update: As I mentioned in a previous post; toward the end of Bren’s cancer story we had both become very aware that I would have to opt back into working outside the home to continue to support our little family where he left off. We knew that there was some superannuation and insurance…

18/10/17 Happy Birthday Bren

It’s a tough day. Beautiful painful. Beautiful because today we celebrate an incredible human being whose humanity was equaled only by how he was loved and how he loved. Painful, because he isn’t here physically to celebrate with us. We miss you babe, and as all the first’s roll around without you: fathers day last…

10-10-17 Beautiful Painful

I’m sure many have experienced the depth of sadness and undeniable beauty I have, in a pure and joyous moment of remembering — where both the beauty of a cherished memory and the pain of devastating loss can be experienced simultaneously – enhancing each to a level barely tolerable and yet you let the feeling…

01/10/17: Brendan loved the ‘Kombi Festival’

‘The Old Bar Festival is not a festival to us…it’s our religion.’ ~ Tyra Maloney Perfectly summed up by our daughter this week, the Kombi Festival as it’s affectionately known in our house is the Maloney Mecca. The first Old Bar Beach Festival was amazing, our kids were toddlers and we pushed them around looking…

27-09-17: The next Step!

Brendan and I had what might be considered a pretty traditional relationship. Not for everyone I know—but it worked for us. When it came to the big stuff, like raising a family, we were on the same page and that made the doing easier. I stayed at home with the children, Bren worked outside the home….

25-09-17: you can’t please everyone

Four weeks to the day after losing Brendan I received a message from a couple who are well known to us. Even so, we have barely seen them throughout Bren’s illness. The message explained that they were in the area and wanted to see the kids and I as much as they could while they…

14 August 2014…some days are hard

I’ve said it recently, and I’ll say it again now … keeping a positive attitude in no way exempts you from going through difficult times! This is one of the small lessons I have learned in the last couple of months. Positive thought doesn’t take away the crappy days or the awful side effects that…

7 August 2014… hair today gone tomorrow

In the shower on Thursday when we were getting ready to go down for the next lot of treatment Bren’s hair started falling out, just like that!  It was like OK today’s the day, and every time he put his hands near his hair some of it fell out. Ironically he had a pretty good…

29 July 2014… playing the glad game

Anyone out there old enough to remember the story of Pollyanna may have a slight aversion to the word positivty. Me, I loved that story and I know you have heard me say “positive” many times in relation to what my family is going through at the moment. I understand this is not a word…

23 July 2014 …first chemo: crash cart required

It’s fair to say we are both very anxious as we turn up at Day Therapy this morning. It’s 8 am and we are the first ones here. The reception area is a bright airy room, with a coffee and tea bar opposite the reception desk. The furniture is modern, in caramel and coffee colours…